The Fifth Member
by Sherkoni
Summary: A girl has joined the Reikai Tentei.... Nooooo! Sick of obnoxious Mary Sues? Read this.


Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho. Format of this fic is based off the idea of 'Nine Men and a Little Lady'.

**The Fifth Member**

By: Sherkoni

* * *

**Koenma's Journal**

It seems we have a new member of the Reikai Tentai. I don't really remember recruiting her. I mean . . . we don't _need_ another fighter, as far as I knew. But, alas, she is here anyway.

Perhaps I let her on because she was Yusuke's cousin. Wait... Yusuke doesn't have a cousin. Hold the phone-- she must be Kurama's daughter, that's right... Well, no, that's wrong too. Kurama's not even _married. _

Aha! She must be Hiei's _other _twin sister. In which case I guess she's not really a twin, she's a _triplet._ Huh. Except Hiei only has one sister.

This is all so confusing. Where did she come from and why is she suddenly one of my Spirit Detectives? Doesn't matter. We all adore her.

Did I go drinking last night? I know I'm not supposed to, lest I get spankings, but... Damn that ogre and his mighty peer pressure!

* * *

**Kurama's Journal**

We're off to the dark tournament. The fifth member of our team... Kimiko, or was it Yumiko?... is really starting to freak me out... She keeps staring at me. ALL THE TIME. Her eyes are multi-colored, one gold and one crystal blue. Sort of like a retarded dog, but I'm finding myself finding them totally enticing and mysterious... Attractive, even.

Except not. _So_ not. Get a hold on yourself man!

She's completely icy and standoffish, something that normally does not invite one for conversation, but I have this insatiable urge to talk to her. Comfort her, even though she acts like a female version of Hiei. Which I think the fire demon might find attractive as well, because she's just soooo much like him.

Ah! Jealousy! Must strangle best friend to obtain beautiful girl!

Wait, _no! _What in the nine Makai hells is wrong with me? Must resist... must stay strong...

* * *

**Hiei's Journal**

The new girl is part wolf. Or part fox. Uh... wait. I actually think it might have been part raccoon.

Not that I care. Hn.

WHICH reminds me, _who_ said she could use my word? 'Hn' is _my_ catchy anime phrase. But she's been Hn-ing none stop since we boarded the ship.

That's it. I'm getting a new word. I was thinking about trying out 'spankin', actually. Note to self: Try new word out on baka ningen. Record any negative response.

Waidaminute. Wait just a poly-picking minute. Something is definitely wrong here. I feel this very odd, very unwanted, feeling of _liking_ to this sickeningly perfect girl. But what's not to like? She has a darker past than mine! She has a poor attitude and a cynical disposition!

How indescribably _appealing._

Wait! No! Argh! What's wrong with me? Must've been that chicken I ate...

* * *

**Yusuke's Journal**

Um, who asked her onto MY team? I certainly didn't. And last I remember, I was the one who was supposed to pick the fifth member of our team. Who was this half-demon chick anyway? Kaleima... or maybe it was Kat... is Hiei's other, lost sister I think. You know, I _was_ going to pick Genkai. But noooooo, little miss raven-haired bad ass had to ruin it.

How the hell am I supposed to get Genkai's orb if she's not _here_ to give it to me? Hm?

But of course, she's my favorite cousin and an even stronger fighter than me, so I'm more than happy to have her on my team.

Wait, that's not right. I don't have a cousin.

Right, anyway. The training with Genkai was really tough, and I'm actually feeling really tired so I think I'll . . . . just . . . . (-snore-)

* * *

**Kuwabara's Journal**

Am I seriously the _only_ one who sees it? Everything is about her! Her hair is silver today, with violet streaks, and her eyes are red. The colors clash, but whatever, everyone else seems to think they look perfect.

On the boat today, one member of each team had to get up on this platform and fight. Aha, I thinks to myself - finally time to strut some moves! But then, a Certain Person Who Shall Not Be Named But Seems To Like To Impress Certain Demons On Our Team gets all, silent and powerful and goes, 'I'll do it.'

Uh, hello? What if we don't _want_you to do it? Right, doesn't look like I'm going to get much support on that point. Actually, I myself am suddenly very curious to what powers she holds.

I'm also suddenly very concerned about her safety. It's just her against all those demons. Never mind the fact that she's part-unicorn and radiates a power none of us have ever seen before. Everyone else seems worried about her too, even Hiei.

Hiei... worried? What the hell is going on?

Ah! Will write later, suddenly we're surrounded by demons. Looks like I'll get to strut my stuff after all. Woot!

* * *

**Yusuke's Journal**

It would have been so cool for me to have punched the lights out of that guy _while_ I was sleeping. Would have made me look even more bad-a then I already am. But unfortunately, Takao (or was it Shadow?) decided to have herself a 'hero-of-the-day' moment, and "protect" me. Ch. _Thanks._

* * *

**Kurama's Journal**

Been at the tournament a few days. Getting harder and harder to resist Taisha... or Okami... uh, yeah. Youko has a past with her apparently. They once fell in love. Any day now I'm going to suffer the same fate, offering her my rose or some such act. Which, by the way, I still need as a weapon, but what the hay? She can have it.

Gah, no! I fear I'm already falling. Just yesterday I was forced to save her from a random demon -- yes, a random demon. They tend to pop up around her. I had no choice! If I hadn't, she would have thrown herself in front of it and incurred some sort of nasty injury that would "require" me to nurse her back to health.

I don't know why she didn't just save herself. Since she's supposedly so strong.

It's getting harder to avoid her. I wonder if anyone would notice if I accidentally let my death plant loose in her room? Uh, on second thought, that probably wouldn't work. I think I have to be in my fox form to release that for the first time. And Youko loves her.

Damn my luck.

**

* * *

Botan's Journal**

I'm so confused right now. I mean, I know I'm not always the brightest crayon in the box, but this is just ridiculous. So is she half demon with a horrific past? Or is she a "teenager" from America? It's all so complicated.

And does anyone else notice how her hair keeps changing colors? And if she's so bent on never letting her heart love again, why is she dressed in that slutty fighter's outfit? Who is she trying to impress? Kurama's been avoiding her like the plague as best he can, shrieking like a little girl when she touches him. But of course, then he gets all seductive, 'love-poetry' style.

Why does everything revolve around HER? Wait, am I jealous? But I don't even like any of the members on our team! Aaaah...

* * *

**Kuwabara's Journal**

Fought a kid with yo-yos today. It was a little embarrassing, because I lost, but then I realized he cheated. I'm still awesome. Of course, shorty had to say otherwise, but who cares? He's far enough down there I can block out his voice.

Except, as of recently, Miss Prissy 'Female-version-of-Hiei' has decided she likes to say rotten stuff to me too. She doesn't even know me! Why am I automatically dubbed an idiot? And really, _Kuwabaka_? Not even hamster-legs has that dumb of insults.

And more unfortunately, I can hear her. I think at one point she was as short as Hiei, but she seems to change height as we go along. It's getting confusing, who exactly she's going for. Hmmph! I haven't seen her look _my_ way once.

I think I'm grateful. 'Sides, I got Yukina.

Which reminds me! Must remember to find out the joke that everyone was laughing at today, that I didn't understand. Stupid jerks. Oh well. I'm the tallest. Still awesome.

* * *

**Hiei's Journal**

You know, if I was really _that_ worried about my arm, do you think I would have released the dragon in the first place? No. But of course Rhiannon... or maybe it was, Kiseki... just _had_ to come and heal it for me with her tears or some mystic mumbo-jumbo like that.

So now my arm is healed and she's ruined a few essential scenes in the series. And I'm starting to feel attracted to her.

This is very wrong on near every level of hell, but I can't help it. Hn. Er, I mean... Spankin'. I must get away from her. Amazingly, she's not half anything today. She's a full fire demon. How convenient.

And on another more horrifying note, it appears my Jagan is in heat and has to find a mate. Maybe it's just me, but I thought it was just an _eye._ It doesn't need a mate. Hell - it doesn't have anything to mate _with. _But even though I am the one with it instilled in my forehead, I am apparently wrong.

Because I now have this insatiable lust for her.

No! Don't! Arg... must resist... must not give into the temptation of sweet snow that she offers. Dammit! This is so frustrating! Does she think me incompetent? I may not be human, but I have at least been able to decipher that it's _ice cream_. And who the hell says I like it?

But I do.

Don't!

Inari help me...

* * *

**Yusuke's Journal**

Beat the wind master today. And some other guy that trashed on Kurama. Bastard... Of course Selina -- or is it Tathalia? no, maybe it's Rilliana -- was all over herself. We had to physically drag her away from his body.

Well now we've we ran into the Toguro team. And Miss Prissy is going all fainty-evil-approachy -- as if we can't tell for ourselves? FEH. Well I've got some intimidating to do.

And I also need to right up my will since I'm apparently not getting much stronger, due to the fact that Genkai _isn't_ here. Um, never mind. She just showed up, for plot reasons I suspect. But I'm having this _large_ problem that I wasn't her only student.

SHE was her student as well, one that showed exceptional talent and potential.

At one point, I thought that was my role. You know, me? The main character? Died in front of a car? HAS TO FACE TOGURO! A little _focus_ would be nice. Sheesh.

* * *

**Koenma's Journal**

It's the night before the final match. Kurama and Jeroki... I mean, Kosame. Whatever! I can't keep her names straight. Anyway, the two of them took a 'midnight stroll'. Poor Kurama doesn't stand a chance. She's got him wrapped around her angsty little finger.

I guess we'll have to sacrifice fox-boy's dignity so we can all get a chance to focus on something other than her. I think Hiei's a little jealous, though he's trying not to show it. They're back. Will there be a fight? Likely. She would just _love _that.

Hang on -- where'd she go...? If she's gotten herself dramatically injured _again_...

* * *

**Kurama's Journal**

Unn... What happened? ... can't quite... remember...

Yusuke's been giving me smug looks all evening...

Hiei did something really weird. He told me to stay away from his mate. And then he freaked out and said to keep her. And if I didn't object, he was going to sick his dragon on her.

And then I... think I ...said, 'Don't touch her, I love her!'

AAH! Noooooo! Oh, how the mighty have fallen! Woe is me! I still can't remember quite everything, but I do remember a kiss, sweet declaration of love, tears... god, it must have been a soap opera ... anime style...

I'm so ashamed.

That does it. After we win the tournament, I'm flinging myself into Hiei's arms. Perhaps THAT will keep her at bay...if she returns. Which she will. Of course she will. -shudder- It never ends.

* * *

**Hiei's Journal**

Spankin'. Showed everyone my superiority and finished off Bui. I rock _so _hard. Much better than the others did, anyhow.

Mental note: must remember to gloat later on.

Of course, my good mood was ruined when Miss Telepathy got done with her fight and I had to use my Jagan to "heal" her, _after_ my fight with Bui. Desperately needed hibernation, but did it anyway. God damn you mating season. Wait... was it mating season before? How come _I'm_ the only demon (there's an entire stadium full that seem completely sterile) that's affected?

I'm going to sleep now. I wish _she_ wasn't lying right next to me, but I think I'm starting to feel comforted. I'll sleep good and it'll have nothing to do with the fact that I have no energy. She belongs at my side.

Arg... too... tired... to hurt self... for idiocy...

* * *

**Mary Sue's Journal**

Um... so the tournament's over. We won, of course. I called Kuwabaka an idiot a lot on the way home to make Hiei like me more. It totally worked.

I'm not sure what to do now. All these psychic people are showing up and stuff. Like, I know I'm already the most powerful psychic, but I still have to help the guys so they see how powerful I am "for a mere woman". Oooh! Maybe I should get kidnapped! Then Hiei could rescue me - like, right before I get sexually assaulted or something.

Kurama's so shexah! Maybe I should get myself injured again so he has to nurse me back to health! That would soooo rock! Yummy!

But of course, I'll have to prove my amazing intellect skills at that one House. And I dunno, maybe kick a few butts. Can't let Kuwabaka get all the 'spirit-feeling' glory (he's _so_ not cute).

I can't wait to meet this Sensui guy! He'll probably be attracted to me too. God, it's good to be me.

* * *

**Kaitou's Journal**

I'm such a friggin' genius. Had the gang over at my wicked sweet crib and pulled a few tests on them. Well, no. It was more like Genkai's tests. Whatever.

Kurama and his team were pretty cool, except this one girl. She was freakily perfect. Did no one else see it?

I stole all of their souls, except Kuramas. I was extremely bummed to find that he defeated me in my mind game, but I suppose it was worth it. He had a uncanny resemblance to Drew Carey.

I didn't damage the souls, and they all returned to normal. Except one...

I think I must have _accidentally_ sat on it.

-End-


End file.
